It’s Come to This

by Abby on March 5, 2015

Monday: school closed due to icy conditions.

Tuesday: school closed 2 hours early due to weather.

Wednesday: rain all day, turns to snow overnight.

Thursday: This.

more snow

schools closed

Friday: Will our children ever attend a full day of school again? Ever??

And so it’s come to this:

I make them run like hamsters on a wheel to earn screen time. And then we pray and pray and pray for spring.

Facebook Twitter Pinterest Plusone Linkedin Stumbleupon


Dear Customer Service Person

by Abby on March 3, 2015

Dear Customer Service Person:

First off, I recognize that you have a difficult job. Customer service people and moms have a lot in common, actually: people don’t call us up to be like, “Hey, just wanted to tell you that you’re doing a great job! Kudos! Keep it up!” No, we only hear from them when IT’S ALL WRONG AND IT’S ALL OUR FAULT. So I feel your pain. I really do.

Second, please know that I have ordered from your company (Amazon) a bajillion times and never had a problem. UNTIL TODAY. This is unfortunate. Because all my past orders of books and diapers and cleaning supplies and other items were not life-or-death purchases. If they had been delayed or mixed up, it would’ve been inconvenient but not earth-shattering. UNLIKE TODAY.

See, today my 6yo son was anxiously awaiting his birthday gift. His gift that someone (me) ordered last week but was too cheap to opt for anything besides free shipping. I KNOW: PRIME. Believe me, I’m regretting forgoing that $99 expense. And I feel like this is your passive-aggressive way of punishing me for that. Point made. But do you know what I can do with $99? Pay for 9 hours of babysitting, for one. Do you know what I could do with 9 hours of child-free time, Amazon? DO YOU??

OK, so back to the gift. This was not just any gift. This was a Power Rangers Megaforce Deluxe Gosei Morpher, Amazon. Do you have any idea what that is? Neither did I. But ask any Power Ranger-obsessed 6yo and he’ll tell you it’s a hot-ticket item. My son was literally waiting by the door for this thing to arrive. On Friday, his actual birthday, on Sat., and again on Mon., when the package tracking on your site PROMISED it would arrive.

You LIED, Amazon. My son and I were more disappointed than when the release date of the Angry Birds Go! app was delayed. More disappointed than when the green light saber broke. More disappointed than when America’s Funniest Videos was preempted by a news alert. SO DISAPPOINTED! And then I had to look at this face:

Disappointed face

And you know what makes it worse, Amazon? The fact that we are looking down the barrel of our quadrillionth snow day here. School has been delayed countless times this year. It was closed last Thurs. Again on Mon. Then on Tues., it closed 2 hours early. So this package, this toy, THIS $14 GODSEND, could have made the difference between salvaging the day and ALL HELL BREAKING LOOSE. So when the package FINALLY arrived, and we opened it to find this:

Wrong package

What do you think happened, Amazon? I’ll tell you what happened. This:

tantrum gif

Oh, the tears. And the wails and gnashing of teeth. And not just from me. My son was bummed, too.

Look, I get that these are first world problems. But believe me when I tell you that the link between this mom and her sanity is a plastic Power Rangers toy. So you’ll work with me to get this fixed, right? I mean, the way I see it, we’re on the same team. You want happy customers, I want happy customers.

It’s just my bad luck that MY customers will screech and whine and throw themselves on the floor till I want to stuff unpaired Spongebob socks in my ears to stop the aural onslaught. I try so hard, Amazon. SO HARD. But I’m only human, OK? So thank you, Customer Service Person, for anything you can do. I’m counting on you. Please.

Yours in solidarity,

A Mom Who Just Wants Her Kid to Be Happy and Leave Her Alone for 10 Minutes If That’s Not Too Much to Ask

UPDATE: I took to Twitter with my complaint and @AmazonHelp responded immediately. They are re-sending the Morpher overnight and refunding the purchase price and shipping. Stay tuned!

Facebook Twitter Pinterest Plusone Linkedin Stumbleupon

{ 1 comment }

Happy Birthday to My Boy!

February 27, 2015

Dear Riley, Happy Birthday! Today you are 6. You are many things to many people. You are brave: Smart: Loyal: And loving: You are a master of disguise: And you have never met anything you couldn’t climb: I mean, not ANYTHING: Thank you for teaching me that life is better when you love fiercely, dress […]

Read the full article →

On Daily Joy and Fresh Perspectives

February 23, 2015

Last week I read a blog post that really spoke to me. It was about feeling stuck, in writing and in life. It’s about broken washing machines and insomnia and other everyday inconveniences and frustrations that the author called “puzzles we have to figure out in order to get to and maintain our Daily Joy.” […]

Read the full article →

Rileyisms: Mid-Winter Edition

February 9, 2015

Winter is tough on my mental health. The cold, the gray, the snow delays, the illnesses. Also taxing on my psyche? Being stuck at home with sick kids. Blessedly, we have not been hit with the 5 feet (!) of snow that is currently overwhelming my in-laws in Massachusetts. And the illnesses are just severe […]

Read the full article →

The Purpose of Life from a Kid’s P.O.V.

January 30, 2015

7:15 a.m., Thursday morning: “Mom, you know what the purpose of life is?” This is the question my 8yo poses to me as I stumble into the kitchen in search of coffee. On the one hand, how could I possibly pass up the answer to this burning existential question? And from the mouth of my […]

Read the full article →

3 Fun Indoor Winter Activities (for a Real-Life Family)

January 22, 2015

By day, I often write and edit blog posts for clients that have to do with health, wellness, family fitness, that sort of thing. Everybody loves the “Secrets to Eating More Veggies” and “10 Tips for Raising Active Kids” type of posts. Even *I* click on them, even though (I hate to admit) I usually […]

Read the full article →

3 Ineffective Strategies for Dealing with a Tantrum

January 16, 2015

My kindergartener is either the snuggliest love bug or as mean as an angry drunk. Nothing in between and no warning when the switch flips. Take swimming lessons, for instance. He loves them. Cannonballs into the pool, splashing, kicking, grinning. Doesn’t even mind the showering and toweling off after, fond as he is of any […]

Read the full article →

My Tips to Stick with the Gym Past January

January 8, 2015

The parking lot’s packed around the clock? Gridlock in the locker room? Nary an open treadmill in sight? It seemed like a good time to run this post from my archives. You know what my motivation was to go to the gym 3 times this week? COLD. It was the only way I could get […]

Read the full article →

Not Ready for the New Year

January 4, 2015

I’ve been trying to figure out why this time of year bugs me. Everywhere, everything is all: New Year, New You! 10 Ways to Make Resolutions Stick! 5 Best Diets to Drop the Holiday Pounds! How to Make 2015 Your Best Year Ever!!! Meanwhile, we’ve barely arrived home from our holiday travels, bags still packed […]

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...
Read the full article →