Abby Off the Record — The scoop on life, writing & raising kids

An Earthquake in Baltimore?!

August 24, 2011

Yesterday just before 2pm, per usual during my kids’ nap time, I was sitting at my desk with about 5 different tabs open on my laptop. (Gmail, Google, Twitter, Facebook, and Word, if you’re curious.) I heard a thumping, shaking noise overhead and my first thought was, “Raccoons!” (We have a sordid history with raccoons […]

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Vacation Bests & Worsts

August 22, 2011

I’m back! And I am happy to report that our vacation last week was actually…wait for it…FUN. Relaxing, even. No, really! You thought I was going to say “not that bad” or “only slightly preferable to getting a root canal,” didn’t you? I will admit that while in the past I’ve had trouble using the […]

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Gone to the Lake

August 15, 2011

While I’m on vacation this week, please enjoy this post from my archives. Two years later, we’re back at the same place with 6 fewer adults and 1 more child. (No newborns, whew!) So far, so good — the kids are sleeping and no one’s fallen in the lake…yet. Survivor: Deep Creek Lake There was […]

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What Keeps Me Sane

August 12, 2011

We live a few miles away from a renowned mental health facility. This fact is often mentioned by my mom-friends when we’re having a particularly bad day (or week). “I’m reserving my room,” we (half) joke. “I’m one step away from checking myself into the loony bin.” (Admit it: a clean, quiet room where they […]

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Things I Want to Say But Can’t

August 10, 2011

Why does everyone always ask ME what’s for dinner? I don’t remember volunteering to be the family chef in charge of an endless variety of meals with multiple menu options. It smells funny? Well, so do you and we still love you. I would much rather eat cake for dinner, too, but I’m trying to […]

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Readers Speak Out About Housework

August 8, 2011

If you’re like me, you really enjoyed those episodes of “Oprah” where she’d talk to women around the world about what their lives are like. So, for instance, the woman from Denmark or wherever would talk about her awesome maternity benefits and the woman in France would talk about how she bikes everywhere instead of […]

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I’m Quitting Summer

August 5, 2011

Dear Kids, I quit. Effective immediately, I hereby resign as your summer activities coordinator/cruise director/source of nonstop entertainment. We’ve been to the beach, the brook, and the duck pond. We’ve spent as much time at the pool as the lifeguards. We’ve played in the sprinkler, the water table, and on the Slip ‘n’ Slide. We’ve […]

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Good News/Bad News

August 3, 2011

I try to look on the bright side of life, I really do. But some days it’s just So. Darn. Hard. Good news: My mom comes to help with the boys while C. is away (again) on business. Bad news: Her too-brief visit is over, and the boys and I have to take her to […]

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Housework, Divorce, and Going on Strike

August 1, 2011

I freely admit that I DO judge books by their covers, and one that caught my eye was “I Almost Divorced My Husband But I Went on Strike Instead,” by Sherri Mills. Before anyone gets all up in arms, let me just say that this morning alone I have changed a set of pee-soaked sheets, […]

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Flashback Friday: Well, They Do Make Adult Diapers…

July 29, 2011

Here we go again — potty training! Same deal, different kid. Hope you enjoy this post from my archives. (Spoiler alert: Miles DID eventually become potty trained. Whew!) Well, They Do Make Adult Diapers… You only have to glance at the thickness of What to Expect the First Year and similar tomes to realize that […]