Trying to Cope with Fear and Danger as a Parent

by Abby on April 17, 2013

Woman in despair

Photo credit: Miss Cartier on Flickr

I can clearly remember the first night home from the hospital with my firstborn. While the baby was downstairs with his dad and grandparents, I was upstairs sobbing on the bed. It had just hit me that we lived in Baltimore, one of the murder capitals of the country, the setting for the violent crime dramas “Homicide: Life on the Street” and “The Wire.” What the hell was I THINKING, bringing a BABY into this world?! It suddenly seemed like the worst, most irresponsible, most irreversible decision ever.

Since then I have struggled with issues that plague all parents everywhere: keeping my children safe, learning to accept that the world is a scary place. The Newtown shooting shook me to the core, like every other parent in America, particularly those of us with 6yo’s. Then came the Boston Marathon bombing.

I wasn’t sure I was going to write about it, but when I got up this morning and faced my weekly deadline for TheBump.com, I decided I couldn’t NOT address it. I decided I had a forum and an opportunity to try to put into words what so many of us are feeling, in the hopes of offering some comfort to other parents out there who may be struggling to make sense of senseless acts.

In times like this, many say “There are no words.” But words are all I have to offer. I hope you will find some recognition or comfort in my post, “5 Honest Realizations I’ve Had Since Becoming a Mom.”

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{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }

Corey Feldman April 23, 2013 at 6:01 pm

I know it is so scary, no matter where you live. If you lived in Baltimore, you probably know my area. I’m in Montgomery County, and in Potomac at that. My kids will go to the same school that 90210 was based on, and I actually taught at briefly. But no matter where you are you never know. I grew up in Potomac as well, 2 miles from my home. There was a pedophile that lived down the street. At a pretty young age I was hung from a 10 story building and thrown up and the air, thankfully caught, by an Uncle (through marriage) that also put one of my cousins through a wall. Also in Potomac. Newton kind of shows this kind of stuff can happen anywhere. But I know what you mean about the areas. I love taking my kids into DC. Its so close and so much. But after the bombing, I told my wife how worried I was about do that this summer with the boys. Its a parents worst nightmare, and even the most helicopter parents among as can’t to anything to stop a 9/11, Boston, or Newton. I’m still waiting to mourn the day my kids realize the big builders in front of our Synagogue aren’t for decoration and climbing on.

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Abby April 24, 2013 at 9:33 am

We’re practically neighbors, Corey. 🙂 It’s true, scary things can happen anywhere. It can be a challenge not to project that fear onto our kids. I also pray that mine stay innocent and unaware of these dangers as long as possible.

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